Last night my brother, sister and myself sat around telling my mother some of our drinking stories.  I especially enjoyed it when my sister said, "Sometimes you get so wasted that you think you can run anywhere, but after a couple of blocks you fall and get really angry at the ground and anyone that happens to see you and then you have to figure out your way back from where you came."  Yes mom, sometimes we wander the streets like wayward harpies begging looking for more than just trouble.  

This all started when my sister pointed out that we like to have drinking contests with men.  Actually, I think her exact words were, SEND ME THE MAN THAT DRINKS ME TO DEATH AND I'LL SHOW YOU THE MAN I CAN MARRY, which eventually lead to the discussion of the fact that my sister is a hard core whiskey drinker and I can probably drink your Uncle Yusef under the table when it comes to vodka.  You wish I was kidding.  I am perhaps the least confrontational of the group because I like to turn into a kitten and makeout and then lose my mind thinking about the fact that maybe someone is going to die.  Last week it was my dog and my sister said she almost had to beg strangers for some xanax because I began to flip out.  I guess it's true, I do love my dog more than most people.  My brother likes to get into really big fights and everyone knows it and tries to keep him out of them, too bad he doesn't give a shit that we do not want him to get knifed in a bar fight.  The best part of all was when my brother and sister had left and I was sitting there with my mother and she was like, "Some people are like OH, MY CHILDREN, THEY ALL GRADUATED WITH HONORS AND ARE SAVING THE WORLD, but I gave birth to a bunch of crazy lunatics that want to drink you under the table and beat the shit out of you."  I don't think she's ever spoken truer words.