I really hate having a blog because I feel like whenever I have anything clever to write I am busy sitting in traffic and I think the idea to death or start mega dancing in my car to entertain myself beyond human comprehension. I hate having a blog even more because I think it highlights my failed writing career and the fact that it could never be failed cause I would have had to actually participate in the idea of pursing a career and not incredibly good looking guys or free drinks. Blogging is like making a toast to all the things in life that I was too lazy to work for. SOMEONE START HANDING ME SHIT FOR FREE. What I hate even more are bloggers that are like HERE IS A CRYPTIC MESSAGE. I AM PRETENDING TO SOUND DEEP BY TALKING ABOUT PAPER CUTS ON MY EYELIDS AND SMALL CHINESE BOYS WITH SEVERED INTESTINES POURING FROM THEIR ABDOMINAL REGIONS LIKE THE THOUGHTS IN MY HEAD--THE PROBLEMS IN MY LIFE. Whoa, that is so contrived I want to grow into a tree of Dr. Giggles and kill you all. Especially, because I am one of you sons of bitches.